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I'm a mother, wife, grandmother, daughter, sister, friend. I'm a self-taught potter. I make beads from clay and jewelry from my beads. Follow me on my online journal as I toss around ideas from my life and from my studio.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Swimming to the surface

I hope I didn't lose anyone. I know I've been gone for a while. I feel like I've been in a fog or underwater since my husband passed away in July. I have been just dabbling in clay for the last 3 months. Mostly because I needed to attend my weekly clay group/therapy sessions. But I couldn't really bring myself to add any color to anything. I haven't even worn any of my jewelry in the last 3 months. I guess it's my way of mourning. I didn't wear black all the time but I had trouble adding that extra splash of color to outfits. It just didn't seem appropriate.

But I feel like I am slowly swimming back to the surface. I can see the light up there, even that sparkle when the sun hits the waters surface just right. I've been waiting for the right inspiration or jolt or something to spark the designer in me. I think it was a combination of several things. I moved and had set up a small but comfortable studio space in my new home. Then I just waited. There was plenty to do in the mean time. I was recently very inspired by Art Bead Scene's October Monthly Challenge. I loved the mix of metals and the muted colors of the inspiration piece. So I began laying out a design but I kind of stalled. Then, I mentioned to a friend who is also a clay bead artist and jewelry designer that I was really experiencing a design block as I was admiring a beautiful piece that she had created. I also mentioned to her that I hadn't worn any of my jewelry for the last 3 months. So she placed her beautiful piece around my neck. And by the way, I had on the perfect black blouse to showcase her lovely creation. And told me to wear it that day. So I did. And I have to say, it felt great. Here is Deana's piece and if you are local, she is having a preview sale at her house on December 3 before we do the Ardovino's Holiday Market in Sunland Park, NM. on December 5. E-mail me if you want her address or directions to Ardovino's.

After wearing this piece for the day, I went home and finished up my Art Bead Scene October Monthly Challenge Entry. And here it is.

I'm excited to be back in the wonderful world of color as they used to say in the Disney advertisements. Wow, I'm really dating myself there. I know there will be hard times to come. But the clay and the color and life going on will keep pulling me back. I also have a brand new grandson to celebrate. He fought hard to get here and to get strong and healthy. I will fight too.


  1. Hello Cindy, I am impressed of how strong you are. I hope you will feel a little better every day. Your piece of jewelry is truely special. I love it. Sending you lots of hugs and sunshine.

  2. You know, I have only read your blog for a short while, and I think I got hints from your posts about your loss, but maybe it didn't completely register...sending you lots of love and like Nicki, sunshine...your hubby is smiling at/hugging you from somewhere beyond! Your work is so beautiful...

  3. Oh Cindy, so good to hear from you. And such a beautiful necklace you made for ABS. You are brave and courageous. It is OK to be patient with yourself. I wish you continued strength and healing.

  4. Welcome back...many hugs to you as you head back into the colorful world. Looking forward to hearing more stories on your path back... :) Jen

  5. Hi Cindy, the world is full of so many colors and not all are bright, and yet they are still colors in their own right. I recall a Greg Allman song with the words, "and mostly shades of gray". So glad to see you are blogging again.

  6. So glad you are back and swimming to the surface. After reading to post when your husband died-I was so saddened and kept you in my prayers. A new beginning is always hard. Your necklace is beautiful. Enjoy your new grandson.